Today we are walking in: The Woman As Enhancer
Job 34:16
If now thou hast understanding, hear H8085 this: hearken to the voice of my words.
UNDERSTAND
Today we look to the word-UNDERSTAND- H8085 shama`--to hear with attention or interest, listen to understand (language)
The Torah testifies...............
Genesis 11:7
Go to, let us go down, and there confound their language, that they may not understand H8085 one another's speech.
The prophets proclaim..................
Nehemiah 8:2
And Ezra the priest brought the law before the congregation both of men and women, and all that could hear H8085 with understanding, upon the first day of the seventh month.
The writings bear witness...........................
1 Kings 3:9
Give therefore thy servant an understanding H8085 heart to judge thy people, that I may discern between good and bad: for who is able to judge this thy so great a people?
THE WOMAN AS ENHANCER
Women have one advantage over men. Throughout history they have been forced to make adjustments. The result is that, in most cases, it is less difficult for a woman to adapt to new situations than it is for a man. ~Eleanor Roosevelt
In the next three teachings, we are going to explore some specific purposes for which Yah created the female. If you are a woman, I believe these teachings are especially going to encourage you. You’re going to understand more about yourself and why you are the way you are. You’re going to learn how to be fulfilled by living according to Yah’s design.
I believe these teachings are also going to be a blessing to men who take to heart the principles in them and apply them in their relationships with women. If you are a man, listen to these teachings carefully so that, in all your interactions with the woman, whether she is your wife, friend, fellow employee, or even mother, you will be able to assist her in properly understanding and fulfilling her purpose in creation. If you don’t know why a woman is the way she is, you will continue to misunderstand and misuse her. The purpose of this series is to bring knowledge of who the woman is to light, so that she will not be devalued or abused. Both women and men will be able to secure a better relationship with anyone they encounter if they understand and apply the truths in these teachings.
(Please keep in mind that these principles reflect the idea of Yah’s purposes in creation. We haven’t yet arrived there, but Yah wants us to strive for this idea.)
The female has been placed in her position not because she is less important, but because of her function.
Many men are having problems in their lives today for two reasons. First, they don’t know their own purpose; second, they definitely don’t understand the woman’s purpose. When men do not know their own purpose or the woman’s purpose, this has a negative effect on the woman, causing her both stress and heartache. Yet when a woman understands her purpose and how it relates to the man’s purpose, she can bring much healing and fulfillment to her relationships. She may even be able to alleviate some of the situations of misuse and abuse in her life. You’ll be amazed at what a woman who knows her purpose can become. I’ve met very few men who can handle a woman who knows her purpose.
“Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is The Most High’s purpose that prevails” (Proverbs 19:21). Many are the plans, the opinions, the doctrines, and the concepts that are in our hearts, but it is Yah’s purpose that counts. When we rely on our own understanding of our purposes, we run into difficulty. Yet when we understand Yah’s purposes for us, we can address the needs that come with those purposes. In this way, we can live fulfilled lives.
Purpose determines design and also position. We learned in the discussion of authority and submission in the last teaching that a woman has been placed in her position not because she is less important, but because of her function. Men and women have the privilege of being different. These differences are due to their specific roles in exercising dominion over the earth.
This teaching will discuss the woman’s dominion role as enhancer. The male, who was created first and was given the role of responsible spiritual leader and visionary, was not meant to live in isolation or to fulfill his calling on his own. As enhancer, the woman is a co leader who shares his vision and works with him to accomplish what they were both created to do. The woman takes who the man is and what the man has and enlarges and extends it. In this way, his leadership is effective and their shared vision becomes reality.
The Woman Is the Man’s Companion
Yah always tells you why He makes something before He makes it. “The Most High Yah said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him’” (Genesis 2:18). Therefore, the first purpose of the female as enhancer is to be a companion for the male, so that he won’t be alone. The word alone is made up of two words, “all” and “one.” When you put the two words together, you see that alone basically means “all in one.”
Yah said, “It is not good for this male-man to be all in one, having everything in himself.” Thus Yah drew out another self from him, so that the man would have this other self to share with. Yah made the female so that the male would have someone to give to, someone to share his vision with, someone to be a part of his life. Isn’t it sad that many men don’t see women in this way? The female was created so that the male would not have to be alone. She is his life companion.
“To companion” means to accompany, to attend, and even to guide someone. It is in this sense that a woman is a man’s companion.
The Woman Is Good for the Man
Yah said, “It is not good for this male-man to be alone.” It is clear that, when Yah made this statement, He meant that what He was about to create for the man would be good for him. Therefore, the Word says, “Women are good. Females are good.” The woman was created for the man’s good.
I want to say to my women listeners that Yah knew what men needed, and it was you. When something is made for something else, it has within it that which the other thing needs. When something is made to be good for something else, it has that which is good for the other thing. Therefore, everything Yah created the female to be is good for the male.
A female is very, very good for a male, but where purpose is not known, abuse is inevitable. A woman can abuse her nature and purpose if she doesn’t understand why she is the way she is. In addition, a woman who does not understand her purpose can be a detriment to a man, and a man who doesn’t understand the woman’s purpose can be a detriment to a woman.
Yet Yah said that the highest good for a man besides Himself, is a woman. So in some mysterious way, in spite of what your past experiences in relationships might have been, a woman is, by her very nature, good for a man.
The Woman Shares the Man’s Vision
As enhancer, the woman also enables the man to accomplish the vision and purpose for which they were both created. She shares in this vision, encourages the man along the way, and helps him to accomplish it. If a man has a vision, a woman should do everything in her power to see that it comes to pass.
Women, when you help a man, it doesn’t mean you are putting him down or putting yourself down. It means that you both have equal responsibility, each in the proper position.
In Genesis we read that He showed him everything that had been created. Then Yah told the male what to do with the earth. Therefore, the man was given the dominion vision first. It is important to remember that this is Yah’s vision, not just the man’s vision. I need to impress upon both female and male that it is necessary for a male to have a vision for himself, his family, and all those under his influence. He must have a vision, for he was created to be a visionary.
After Yah had given the man responsibility and work in the Garden, and after He had told the man to have dominion over the earth (the vision), then He said “I’m going to create a helper for the man.” Therefore, one of the purposes of the woman is to share in the vision and responsibilities of the male.
The dominion assignment was given to both men and women.
A male was not meant to carry out his ministry by himself. His vision was not supposed to be fulfilled by himself. This means that a woman was not made to fulfill a vision by herself, either. Everything that the female has- her talents, gifts, expertise, experience, and education- was given to her to help the male fulfill Yah’s vision. This is the reason why women have so much talent. The problem is that men and women don’t understand their purposes, and so they end up using their talents against one another. The woman uses her talents to prove that she doesn’t need the man, instead of using them to help the man. The man hates this use of her abilities because he feels she’s intimidating him. When this happens, both of them lose their purpose in life, and both of them are dissatisfied, because she can’t fulfill her purpose without him, and he needs her to help him fulfill his purpose. They need each other, but they end up working against each other.
What vision did Yah give to the man? He said, “Here’s the Garden: subdue it, work it, cultivate it. Make it better than it is. Develop it, and produce more of it.” In other words, “Take this planet and make it richer than it is. There is seed in this ground that hasn’t yet borne fruit. Make it a harvest. There is gold in the mountains. Dig it out. There are diamonds in the rough. Mine them. I’m going to send you a helper to get this done.”
Again, the dominion assignment was given to both men and women. This means that the woman is meant to help the man fulfill his vision in all areas of life. However, when a man sees the woman coming into the corporate office, he becomes jealous. “What’s she doing here?” he says. “Her place is in the home.” Where did that idea come from? It did not come from Yah. This beautiful, precious gift of the woman was given to men so that they wouldn’t be alone. Yet do you know what men do to women? They despise the very thing that was given to them for companionship and help. Women were made to share the man;s vision and to help him fulfill it.
One of the ways a woman can help the man to fulfill the vision is to give him honor. “Each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and a wife must honor her husband” (Ephesians 5:33). The woman is meant to bless, support, and honor the man, and the man is meant to be a head, a covering, and a protection for her. In this way, they are helping each other to be all they were created to be. Yet these purposes break down when the man and the woman don’t know each other’s needs.
For example, a man always wants to feel as if he had some input into what has been accomplished; he wants to feel as if he is a leader. If you are a wife, try to make your husband feel that he has contributed significantly to your family’s success. When you make a man feel that he is important to what has been accomplished- that he is the one responsible for, or that his input was necessary for, the success of something- then you will have somebody who serves you, because a man feeds on honor. However, if you make him feel unimportant, you will run into trouble. “Well, I don’t need you anyway; I’ve already been doing this for ten years without you.” When you communicate that kind of idea to a man, he will back further and further away from you. He may even go elsewhere, to someone who believes he is everything. That’s the person he will stay with, or move in with, because that’s the person who is fulfilling the needs of his hungering soul.
A man needs honor. This means that the worst thing you can do is to compare your husband to another male. Please don’t tell your husband, “Why can’t you be like our pastor?” or, “Why aren’t you like So-and-so?” That’s the most dangerous and ridiculous thing a woman can say to a man. Every man is his own image of himself. Your job is to support him, even if he is not perfect, and to be an encouragement to him. You have to learn his nature and understand him. The eyes of the woman must be looking to the needs of her husband.
The Woman Is the Man’s Helper
According to the Word of Yah, a woman is also created to be a helpmate.”I will make a helper suitable for him” (Genesis 2:18). A woman is a helpful agent for the man. Let me suggest to you that if a woman is meant to be a helper, she has been designed with many qualities and abilities to equip her to help.
The woman’s purpose is to assist the man in fulfilling Yah’s plan for his life. The implications of this are profound. First, it means the male has to have a plan; otherwise, the female is in trouble. Second, it means that the female must understand that her fulfillment is related to the male’s vision. In other words, she can never really be complete if she does not help him fulfill his vision. A woman has to think, before she does anything, “Is this a help to the man?” If it does not help, then she is abusing her purpose.
A wife and husband need to share the same vision.
When a wife decides she wants a completely different vision for her life than her husband’s vision, they will experience a division. Di means two or double. The word division could be thought of as “double vision.” Whenever you have a couple who has double vision, they are in danger of a divorce, because “a house divided against itself will fall” (Luke 11:17). You can’t have two visions in the same household, or the man and the woman will be going in different directions. That is why Yah created the woman to be in a helping position. Helpers don’t take over; rather they assist. This certainly does not mean that a woman should not have her own interests and develop her own abilities. It means that, as a couple, they need to share the same vision for their lives.
As a woman, even though you may be talented, educated, intellectual, experienced, eloquent, and well-dressed, Yah says, “I gave you all of these things, not only for your own enrichment and enjoyment, but so that you can be a help to men. You need to use these gifts in your positions of helper, of co leader.”What are you using your gifts for? Are you using them to prove to the man that you are just as good he is? That’s not a help; that’s competition.
The woman sometimes needs to exercise extra wisdom when helping the man, because the last thing many men want women to believe is that they need their help. They do not understand how Yah designs women to help them. Yah has said that the man needs the woman’s assistance. Yet when she starts helping, sometimes the man interprets her help as nagging. For instance, imagine a man who is not doing what he’s supposed to be doing in his home. His wife says to him, “Sweetheart, you aren’t praying. You didn’t pray over the food. We didn’t read the Word today.” Can’t you hear his ego screaming, “I’m going to tell you what to do in this house; I’m the man in this house; I’ll pray when I’m ready”?
The helper is just trying to help him. She’s trying to say, “Look, Yah’s vision is for you to be the spiritual leader for me and for our children; however, you can’t be spiritual if you won’t develop your spiritual life.” So the next day she says, “When are we going to pray?” He retorts, “Don’t bother me right now. The Most High will tell me when to pray.” The helper is prevented from doing her job.
Or suppose the woman says, “When are we going to pay the mortgage?” He answers, “I’ve been thinking about it; let me alone.” The next day she says, “The man called about the mortgage.” “Never mind!” he says. Now he’s really getting angry at his helper, when she’s just fulfilling what she was created to do.
I think many of us have been brought up in societies where men don’t think they need help. Therefore, when the helper starts to do what she's meant to do, the man goes completely off his rocker, blows his top, and destroys the gift that’s in the helper. The man needs to appreciate the woman’s role of helper, and the woman needs discernment when giving help.
For example, if a woman’s husband gets fired or laid off, and she says, “Did you lose your job again? You’re always putting the family in these bad situations,” she isn’t helping. She is destroying the man’s self-esteem, wiping out his self-confidence. She is burying his self-honor while she thinks he’s helping. “You know, my mother told me not to marry you. My sisters warned me of this…”
Women, you don’t know what words like that do to a man. If a man messes up or falls down, don’t kick him. Helpers pick people up and dust them off. When they fall down again, they pick them up again. Do you know how many men are where they are today because the helper made sure they got there? Whatever the man is not, it is the woman’s job to help him become. He might not yet be spiritually mature, but it is your job to help him.
A woman can help a man greatly in his spiritual life.
If a man you are married to loses his job, he will need much understanding and support. He will need someone who embraces him. A woman can also greatly help a man in his spiritual life. If your husband doesn’t pray, don’t say, “You don’t pray.” Instead, pray for him. That is a way you can really help him. Then encourage him whenever he shows an interest in spiritual matters.
Many men are put off by their helpers, because they are made to feel very uncomfortable. Helpers are supposed to make people feel comfortable. A man cannot receive help from a woman who is antagonistic against him. He cannot receive help if she is offended by him. Under those circumstances, he needs all his power to maintain his purpose.
To help means to assist. Whenever the female decides that she is tired of helping and is now going to become the boss, her home is in trouble, her relationship is in trouble.
In Genesis we read that Yah told Abraham he was going to have a son. When the promise was delayed, his wife, Sarah, thought she would try to help her husband by giving him her maid as a concubine so that they could have a child through her. She was trying to help her husband, but she was trying too hard. Yah wanted Sarah to be the mother of the child. She should have helped by believing Yah and receiving the promise in Yah’s timing. Instead, she created heartache and strife for herself and her husband. (See Genesis 16 and 21.)
Some men just need a good word from a good woman.
There is another point about the woman as a helper that we need to keep in mind. When Yah said He would make a helper for the man, I believe that He intended the woman to be the “help meet” (Genesis 2:18 KJV) for men in general, not just for her husband. This means that, if you are a woman, you are meant to be a spiritual help and encouragement to the men you encounter in life. Please understand that I am not saying a woman has to submit to other men as she submits to her husband; rather, I am saying that she can be a tremendous influence for good in men’s lives. Moreover, the helping nature of a woman can be exercised whether a woman is married or single, since it is a natural part of her makeup. A single woman has much to contribute in this way, and if she marries, she can bring into her marriage this valuable experience of exercising her gift and understanding the nature and needs of men.
If you see a man you know destroying his life with drugs, you can go to him and say, “Yah has so much potential inside of you. It breaks my heart to see you on drugs.” Your saying that will be helping him. You don’t have to be married to give that type of help. Some men just need a good word from a good woman. Some men don’t have good mothers. They have been told negative things about themselves all their lives. They are looking for a woman to tell them something positive about themselves. Let me caution you that this can require careful discretion on the woman’s part so that the wrong impression is not given. Yet a woman can be a powerful force for good in a man’s life by being an encouragement to him.
Yes, men are starving for good words from women, especially Hebrew women. Yet sometimes Hebrew women are the ones who destroy men the most because they misunderstand their priorities in Yah. They say, “Yah comes first,” and so they neglect their families. The Bible uses strong words about such behavior. It says, “If anyone says, ‘I love Yah; yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love Yah, whom he has not seen” (1 John 4:20). I’m referring to women who go out to save the world but lose their families. They need to think carefully about the help they give. Instead of staying away from home every night of the week to attend prayer meetings, they should be finding ways to encourage and help their husbands and families. That is the way they can best love Yah.
The Woman Is Adaptable to the Man
Yah said, “I will make a helper suitable for him” (Genesis 2:18). Another word for suitable is fit, which means “adapted to an end or design.” A woman is designed for the purpose of adapting to the man. This means that she has built-in energy and the built-in circuits to adapt to his vision and purpose.
Consider the following illustration. A plant grows from the soil and has to stay rooted in the earth in order to live. What determines the health of the plant? The soil that it’s in. If you plant it in soil that is full of nutrients, it will likely thrive. Yet if you plant it in soil that is high in salt content, it will become sickly and might even die. So the plant adapts to what it receives from the environment to which it is connected. Therefore, based on the quality of the soil from which the plant comes, you can usually determine the health and the nature of the plant.
Yah said, “I’m going to make a creation from man that will adapt to the nature of the source from which she comes. Whatever the man feeds her, she will become like that.” If you take a plant and put it in red-dyed water, the plant will absorb the color, and it will show up in the leaves or blossoms. A similar thing happens in the life of a woman. A woman adapts herself to the source from which she came, the male, and absorbs nourishment from him. Therefore, if the man doesn’t like the way the woman is manifesting herself, then he has to check to see what kind of nutrients- or what kind of poison- he is feeding his wonderful plant.
A woman’s adaptability also means that if a woman enters a situation or environment, she is more prone to become like it than the male is. This trait can be a tremendous blessing, but it can also be dangerous. This is why women have to be careful not to open themselves up to any and every environment.
A female is more emotional than a male because she is moved by environmental stimuli. Therefore, a woman will become excited when, for the first time, she enters a community service in which the Spirit of Yah is very strong. A man will walk in with her at the same time, sit in the back, and check it out. If she is asked if she would like to join the community, she will join in three weeks; he will join in three years.
The man is different from a woman. He is wired to be logical, so he wants a logical explanation for everything. “Why do you raise your hands?” he will ask. “You can worship with your hands down.” On the other hand, a woman will generally say, “This is great. I want it, whatever it is.” She’s reflecting her purpose.
Do you wonder why there are usually more women than men in the community? It is because of the way they’re made. A woman will always submit and adapt more easily to spiritual things because of her purpose, because of the way she is designed. Most of the time, it takes men a long time to become logically convinced.
Now it’s hard for a woman to adapt to someone who isn’t leading. She cannot follow someone who isn’t going anywhere. She cannot adapt to the man who doesn’t know what he’s doing. The woman can’t function properly if the man doesn’t function. Therefore, if a man wants a woman to adapt to him, he has to give her something to adapt to. There are many men walking around who have nothing to do, and they’re asking women to help them with it. That’s illegal. Yah told the man, “You will be a provider. You will provide the vision.” A man was made to have a vision. A female was made to help him fulfill it. But if he doesn’t have a vision, how can she help him? She can’t help a man do nothing.
The world is filled with frustrated females who are living with men who aren’t going anywhere.
The world is filled with frustrated females who are living with men who aren’t going anywhere. It’s ridiculous for a man to ask a woman to leave her parent’s home to follow him when he isn’t going anywhere. The first question a woman should ask a man when he asks her to follow him is, “Where are you going in life?” If he can’t answer this question, she should tell him to find a map and say that she’ll talk to him later. A woman is too precious to waste sitting in a house being frustrated for twenty years. It breaks my heart to see the precious, awesome potential of females being suffocated by some male who doesn’t know what he’s doing. Yah says, “I created her to adapt to the male.” Yet the male has to have something for her to adapt to.
It’s difficult enough to have nothing to adapt to, but it’s even worse if you have to adapt to something that isn’t right for you. Many men want women to adapt to a lifestyle that they themselves feel is contrary to their own convictions. The word “adapt” could be translated “submit”. The woman is wired to submit, but she should truly submit only when she recognizes the man’s moral authority over her.
Some men don’t deserve to be adapted to. They are not worthy of it. They’re not giving the adapter that which is comfortable to adapt to. When this is the case, you will find women adapting in bitterness, in hatred, in deceit, or in malice. They’re being forced to adapt to something against their wills, and they hate it.
Whatever the male gives off or gives out, the female will generally adapt to. Eventually, she may become it. She was born to adapt, she was designed to adapt., and so she becomes whatever she feeds on. I have observed women whose husbands or boyfriends are prone to swearing. These, women, likewise, eventually develop the habit of swearing. Children also have their roots in the soil. They suck up whatever is coming from their source, and they end up producing the same kind of fruit as their source. In this way, you end up with a family that looks just like the father. The cause of this is adaptability.
The Woman Enhances Her Own Life
The woman is therefore an enhancer by being a man’s companion, being good for him, sharing his vision, being his helper, and being adaptable to him. In all the ways in which the woman enhances the man’s life, she is also enhancing her own, since she is a co leader and participant in the dominion vision that was given by Yah to the spirit man. When a woman and man learn to live together harmoniously within their purposes and positions, helping and supporting one another, they can live the life they were created to live and find lasting contentment and fulfillment.
Principles
In the woman’s dominion role as Enhancer, she is co leader with the male. She shares his vision and works with him to accomplish what they were both created to do.
The woman takes who the man is and what the man has and enlarges it and extends it.
The first purpose of the female as enhancer is to be a companion for the male, so that he won’t be alone.
The second purpose of the female as enhancer is to be good for the male.
The third purpose of the female as enhancer is to share the man’s vision.
The woman enables the man to accomplish the vision and purpose for which they were both created.
One of the ways a woman can help the man to fulfill the the vision of to give him honor.
The fourth purpose of the female as enhancer is to be the man’s helper.
The fifth purpose of the female as enhancer is to be adaptable to the man.
In all the ways in which the woman enhances the man’s life, she is also enhancing her own, since she is a co leader and participant in the dominion vision.
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