THE MENTOR CHOOSES/THE MENTEE PURSUES

Luke chapter 6







Today we are walking in: The Mentor Chooses/The Mentee Pursues







Habakkuk 2:2




And the LORD answered me, and said, Write the vision, ​ and make it plain upon tables, that he may run that readeth it.
















VISION
















Today we look to the word​ VISION- H2377 chazown- vision(in ecstatic state)​, vision​s​ (in night)​, oracle, prophecy (divine communication)​, vision (as title of book of prophecy)​ ​from H2372; a sight (mentally), i.e. a dream, revelation, or oracle:—vision. to see, perceive, look, behold, prophesy, provide​, ​to see, behold​, to see as a seer in the ecstatic state​, to see, perceive with the intelligence​, to see (by experience)​, to provide



















The Torah testifies........




Numbers 24:4




He hath said, which heard the words of God, which saw ​ the vision H2377 of the Almighty, falling into a trance, but having his eyes open:




Numbers 24:16




He hath said, which heard the words of God, and knew the knowledge of the Most High, which saw ​the vision H2377 of the Almighty, falling into a trance, but having his eyes open:



















The prophets proclaim.........

1​ ​Samuel 3:1




And the child Samuel ministered unto the LORD before Eli. And the word of the LORD was precious in those days;there was no open vision H2377. ​







Jeremiah 14:14




Then the LORD said unto me, The prophets prophesy lies in my name: I sent them not, neither have I commanded them, neither spake unto them: they prophesy unto you a false vision H2377 ​ and divination, and a thing of nought, and the deceit of their heart.
















The writings bear witness.........




1​ ​Chronicles 17:15




According to all these words, and according to all this vision H2377, ​so did Nathan speak unto David.







Psalm 89:19




Then thou spakest in vision ​H2377 to thy holy one, and saidst, I have laid help upon one that is mighty; I have exalted one chosen out of the people.






Chapter 21

The Mentor Chooses/The Mentee Pursues




MENTORING IS ALWAYS the prerogative of the mentor. The mentor determines if mentoring will take place. If you are reading this book because you are in need of mentoring, understand that there are two sides to the mentoring coin.




The first side is mentorship initiated by a leader who is in search of a potential candidate for succession. Intrinsically, all true leaders know they are transitional and therefore must focus not only on managing the present, but also on securing the future of their organization. It is imperative that they mentor future leaders, and thus they must initiate the process by choosing to mentor. Many people might seek out a specific leader to be their mentor, but as a priority and responsibility the leader must choose a mentee and initiate the relationship. He might mentor many individuals in an organization before

narrowing the selection to choose a successor.




In this case, the mentor selects an individual or individuals by his prerogative and invites them to submit to his tutelage, training, and discipline. This is what the great leader Yahusha Hamachiach did when He initiated the

selection of His twelve disciples. Many people were following Yahusha before He intentionally made His choice of the twelve.




Luke 6:12–16 One of those days Yahusha went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to Yah. When morning came, he called his disciples to him and chose twelve of them, whom he also designated apostles: Simon (whom he named Peter), his brother Andrew, James, John, Philip, Bartholomew, Matthew, Thomas,

James son of Alphaeus, Simon who was called the Zealot, Judas son of James, and Judas Iscariot, who became a traitor.




John 15:16 “You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit—fruit that will last.”




Mark 3:13–15 (NKJV) And He went up on the mountain and called to Him those He Himself wanted. And they came to Him. Then He appointed twelve, that they might be with Him and that He might send them out to preach, and to have power to heal sicknesses and to cast out demons.




It is important to note that out of all those who joined His group, Yahusha intentionally and deliberately chose individuals “He himself wanted” to be with Him. These statements are pregnant with the spirit of the mentor and

indicate a desire for training and development by the mentor for future succession.




In this context, the mentor selects the mentee. The mentor invests time, energy, and often money in the mentee. However, as the relationship proceeds, the mentee must experience a transfer of responsibility and begin to pursue the mentor, realizing that the relationship is for the mentee’s benefit.




This dynamic is evidenced by Yahusha, who after calling some men to follow Him challenges them to sacrifice everything for the relationship with Him in order to benefit from the training. For example:




Matthew 16:24–25 Then Yahusha said to his disciples,

“If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it.”




The leader may choose an individual or individuals to establish the relationship for mentoring, but the chosen one must also choose or pursue the mentor to whom he or she will submit in order for the process to be successful.




The second side of mentoring is that the mentee pursues the mentor. Those who desire to be mentored must seek out individuals to whom they will submit for this purpose. If you genuinely want and are willing to submit to a mentor for the process, first you will have to find a prospective mentor and persuade that person to mentor you. Then you will have to continue to pursue the mentor if you wish to benefit from the relationship.




“First you will have to find a prospective mentor and persuade that person to mentor you.” The very nature of leadership, which ultimately is the fulfillment of a vision of the future that exceeds the life span of the leader, makes mentoring a successor a priority and an imperative. A true leader knows he or she is obligated to mentor and must prepare a successor, but the selection of a specific person is his or her prerogative, and it may not be you. Mentors by definition are successful people whose time may be limited. Many people may be pursuing the same mentor, and all or most of them may be worthy of the mentor’s attention. Only a few will stand out enough to get it. The key is to make yourself genuinely available to serve the mentor, whether he chooses you or not. Your goal is to learn and benefit from the mentor’s knowledge,

wisdom, and experience.




As a leader, I am willing to mentor individuals who seriously pursue me seeking help and who willingly submit to me for training. Mentees pursue. Mentors choose or accept mentees. However, mentors are usually more inclined to take on mentees who display an earnest desire to be mentored and who demonstrate sincere effort. Sometimes the prospective mentee’s motivation for pursuit of a mentor is negative or questionable. The approach could be motivated by selfish ambition, a desire to associate with power and position, or to use the relationship to advance a mentee’s personal goals. The discerning mentor will reject this attitude and the spirit of manipulation.




Not Ready to Commit




Mentors will never mentor an unwilling, uncommitted, unsubmitted mentee. One of the most graphic examples of this principle is the succession account of the great biblical prophet Elijah and the mentoring of his successor, Elisha. The first action taken in the story of Elijah and his relationship with Elisha was the indication of Elijah of his willingness to mentor Elisha.




1 Kings 19:15–21 The LORD said to him, “Go back the way you came, and go to the Desert of Damascus. When you get there, anoint Hazael king over Aram. Also, anoint Jehu son of Nimshi king over Israel, and anoint Elisha son of Shaphat from Abel Meholah to succeed you as prophet. Jehu will put to death any who escape the

sword of Hazael, and Elisha will put to death any who escape the sword of Jehu. Yet I reserve seven thousand in Israel—all whose knees have not bowed down to Baal and all whose mouths have not kissed him.” So Elijah went from there and found Elisha son of Shaphat. He was plowing with twelve yoke of oxen, and he himself was driving the twelfth pair. Elijah went up to him and threw his cloak around him. Elisha then left his oxen and ran after Elijah.




“Let me kiss my father and mother good-by,” he said, “and then I will come with you.” “Go back,” Elijah replied. “What have I done to you?” So Elisha left him and went back. He took his yoke of oxen and slaughtered them. He burned the plowing equipment to cook the meat and gave it to the people, and they ate. Then he set out to follow Elijah and became his attendant.




This account of mentorship and succession offers lessons for the twenty-first century leader that may save many organizations from ruin. Let us look a little closer at this powerful story.




First, Elijah, the senior in the relationship, came intentionally to seek Elisha for mentorship training, as he was directed (see 1 Kings 19:16). Then Elijah chooses Elisha for mentoring: “Elijah went up to him and threw his cloak around him” (1 Kings 19:19). This act signified the mentor was choosing the mentee or bestowing on him the mantle of authority.




However, the choosing was not pursuing. It was an invitation for the mentee to pursue. Elisha did not respond with commitment at first, even though the cloak signaled that he was chosen as a mentee and potential successor. So Elijah did not pursue Elisha, but went on his way. Elisha’s parents were his priority. He returned home and continued to be with his family for a while. In essence, Elijah and Elisha did not yet have a mutual mentor/mentee agreement. Elisha wanted to put other things first.




“Elisha then left his oxen and ran after Elijah. ‘Let me kiss my father and mother good-by,’ he said, ‘and then I will come with you’ ” (1 Kings 19:20). Here, we see a lack of

commitment to enter the agreement and make the necessary sacrifice to be mentored. Elijah recognizes that Elisha is not ready.“ ‘Go back,’ Elijah replied. ‘What have I done to you?’ So Elisha left him and went back” (1 Kings

19:20–21). We see that Elijah rejected Elisha to test him for commitment, dedication, and interest. Elijah could have insisted or run after Elisha.




Eventually, Elisha did something that is symbolic of what all true mentees have to do. “He took his yoke of oxen and slaughtered them. He burned the plowing equipment to cook the meat and gave it to the people, and they ate. Then he set out to follow Elijah and became his attendant” (1 Kings 19:21). We see by these acts the ultimate sacrifice, commitment, and dedication to the mentor, which are the foundation of the mutual agreement necessary for mentoring to take place. This is the fulfillment of the second side of mentorship: the mentee pursuing the mentor. We see Elijah finally accepting Elisha when he demonstrated his commitment by his sacrifice.




Letting Go of the Old




Elisha came back with the right attitude. He burned his plow, sold his farm, and barbecued the ox. He showed up at Elijah’s door with nothing. By his submission, he implied, “I am ready to be mentored by you. Whatever you want me to do, I’m ready.” Elijah, in effect, says,

“Now you can come with me, and if you stay with me, you will get the power. You will get the ministry. You will get the company because now it is clear you are ready to serve me.” Notice that Elisha came as an “attendant.” This word means bond servant—one who was marked to be with his master forever.




Elijah accepted him. Elisha’s burning of the oxen and the selling of the farm were the keys to his being qualified for becoming the successor. As long as he had the farm and oxen, he was not completely committed or dedicated. Elisha would know that he would always have something on which to fall back in case things did not work out with Elijah. Wherever there is an alternative or option, there can never be full commitment and dedication to the first objective. This is why, in my experience, marriages with prenuptial agreements hardly ever work out. The agreement is “an escape clause,” dividing the spoils should the marriage end. Commitment and dedication is not possible where an option for escape exists.




Until he surrendered everything, Elisha always would have had a fallback position. He could run back home. When Elijah saw that Elisha had given up his comforts, his assurances, and his security, he essentially said, “Now I will mentor you.” Elisha had shown he was ready to invest in the relationship. He had left his comfort zone. If you are going to follow a mentor, you cannot give excuses. As the mentee, you must be willing to submit, commit, and even sacrifice.




Transfer of Power: True Succession




The most important part of this story of Elijah and Elisha is the mutual agreement and deep love Elisha developed for his mentor. Read his declaration of loyalty and love for Elijah:




2 Kings 2:1–15 When the LORD was about to take Elijah up to heaven in a whirlwind, Elijah and Elisha were on their way from Gilgal. Elijah said to Elisha, “Stay here; the LORD has sent me to Bethel.” But Elisha said, “As surely as the LORD lives and as you live, I will not leave you.” So they went down to Bethel. The company of the prophets at Bethel came out to Elisha and asked, “Do you know that the LORD is going to take your master from you today?” “Yes, I know,” Elisha replied, “but do not speak of it.” Then Elijah said to him, “Stay here, Elisha; the LORD has sent me to Jericho.” And he replied, “As surely as the LORD lives and as you live, I will not leave

you.” So they went to Jericho. The company of the prophets at. Jericho went up to Elisha and asked him, “Do you know that the LORD is going to take your master from you today?” “Yes, I know,” he replied, “but do not speak of it.” Then Elijah said to him, “Stay here; the LORD has sent me to the Jordan.” And he replied, “As

surely as the LORD lives and as you live, I will not leave you.” So the two of them walked on. Fifty men of the company of the prophets went and stood at a distance, facing the place where Elijah and Elisha had stopped at the Jordan. Elijah took his cloak, rolled it up and struck the water with it. The water divided to the right and to

the left, and the two of them crossed over on dry ground. When they had crossed, Elijah said to Elisha, “Tell me, what can I do for you before I am taken from you?” “Let me inherit a double portion of your spirit,” Elisha replied.




“You have asked a difficult thing,” Elijah said, “yet if you see me when I am taken from you, it will be yours—otherwise not.” As they were walking along and talking together, suddenly a chariot of fire and horses of fire appeared and separated the two of them, and Elijah went up to heaven in a whirlwind. Elisha saw this and cried out, “My father! My father! The chariots and horsemen of Israel!” And Elisha saw him no more. Then he took hold of his own clothes and tore them apart. He picked up the cloak that had fallen from Elijah and went back and stood on the bank of the Jordan. Then he took the cloak that had fallen from him and struck the water with it.




“Where now is the LORD, the Yah of Elijah?” he asked. When he struck the water, it divided to the right and to the left, and he crossed over. The company of the prophets from Jericho, who were watching, said, “The spirit of

Elijah is resting on Elisha.” And they went to meet him and bowed to the ground before him.”




What a beautiful story of effective mentorship and succession. Elijah was the consummate mentor, and Elisha the excellent mentee. Notice that Elisha not

only received the mantel of Elijah, but he also received his influence and his school of prophets. Note too that Elisha pursued Elijah right to the end and became his successor. Elisha told Elijah, “As surely as the LORD lives and as you live, I will not leave you.”




Before the mentoring relationship can even begin, you must identify a mentor worth pursuing. So there are two perspectives of mentorship, one is that of the mentor who chooses the mentee intentionally for the purpose of training and preparing that person for potential succession. The other is that of a mentee who, desiring to be mentored, identifies a mentor and indicates the willingness to submit and serve the mentor. This is in order to benefit from the mentor’s wisdom, knowledge, experience, and molding. In both cases, the mentee must pursue the mentor if mentoring is to be successful.




The mentor chooses but does not pursue the mentee. Anyone who could be considered a potent mentor would probably be busy and consumed by his or her priorities and passion. Thus, the ideal candidate would not be waiting casually for someone to come forward and ask to be mentored, nor would this outstanding leader be preoccupied with looking for someone to mentor. In fact, a person worthy of being a mentor already would have many people seeking his or her attention and wisdom. The challenge is that one leader can mentor only a few people effectively.




The mentor ultimately chooses the mentee, but only after the mentee has pursued a relationship and demonstrated the willingness to be mentored. Essentially, whether the mentor chooses the mentee or the mentee chooses the leader as mentor, the initiative and onus still would be on the mentee.




How to Choose a Mentor




Choosing someone to whom you can submit your entire life, plans, goals, ambitions, dreams, visions, and destiny is a very serious decision. Choosing someone to help form your priorities, values, moral convictions, and future

life’s work is critical. You must make the decision with great care. What are some of the qualities you might look for in a potential mentor, and where could you find such a person? Here are a few points I wish to submit for your

consideration. A mentor should be one who has:




• Lived long enough to have a character that has been tested over time by both his supporters and enemies and is worthy of trust.




• Overcome major obstacles, oppositions, challenges, discouragements, and points of failure in the pursuit of achieving a vision or a cause in the interest of humanity.




• Demonstrated wisdom, knowledge, and understanding of the comprehensive nature of life that makes the mentor’s counsel trustworthy.




• Exhibited a longevity and faithfulness to a cause, a vision, or a call with consistency.




• Made major personal sacrifices and demonstrated willingness to bear the cost of a dream and a passion, as well as to help others succeed or achieve their goals.




• Managed failure and success effectively and displayed a spirit of humility and candor.




• Shown willingness to protect his or her integrity and character without compromise.




Getting someone like this to mentor you is not difficult, as I have experienced that every genuine leader or truly successful person wants, desires, and feels obligated to mentor others as a way of giving back. The only requirements or demands would be that the mentee must be serious, committed, and dedicated to being mentored. Leaders do not want to waste their time. Therefore, asking a leader or someone from whom you desire to learn if he or she will mentor you is the first step. However, just as Elijah did, the prospective mentor will test your interest and commitment.




Ready and Willing




If you want someone to consider mentoring you, you must adopt the right frame of mind and demonstrate the right attitude. You must be:




• Willing to serve the mentor and not your personal ambition.




• Willing to sacrifice your personal interests to serve the mentor’s interests.




• Willing to submit totally to the mentor’s instructions, counsel, advice, rebuke, and correction.




• Willing to stay in the background until invited.




• Circumspect about the mentor’s weaknesses and not intent on taking advantage of them or using them as leverage for exploitation or blackmail.




• Vigilant and aware of all that surrounds your mentor and able to learn his/her habits, desires, preferences, interests, and priorities.




• Respectful of the mentor’s relationships or friendships and not intent on taking advantage of them for personal gain.




• Willing to study the process and principles of your mentor, not just his or her results.




• On guard against cultivating a spirit that is jealous of your mentor, understanding that you can never learn from someone if you are jealous of them.




• Open to learning how not to lean on your mentor.

Remember, to be mentored is a privilege and not a right.




Be eternally grateful and express it often. Gratitude will always attract help.




The Perfect Mentee




Again we can look at Joshua and Moses as one of the greatest, most-perfect examples of mentoring and succession. A careful review of their relationship as mentor and mentee provides us with an excellent case study for choosing a mentee and submitting to a mentor. Let us read some of their story and extract the unique principles of mentoring and succession demonstrated in

their relationship:




Exodus 24:13–14 Then Moses set out with Joshua his aide, and Moses went up on the mountain of Yah. He said to the elders, “Wait here for us until we come back to you.”




Numbers 11:28–29 Joshua son of Nun, who had been Moses’ aide since youth, spoke up and said,“Moses, my lord, stop them!” But Moses replied, “Are you jealous for my sake?”




Numbers 27:18–23 So the LORD said to Moses,“Take Joshua son of Nun, a man in whom is the spirit, and lay your hand on him. Have him stand before Eleazar the priest and the entire assembly and commission him in their presence. Give him some of your authority so the whole Israelite community will obey him. He is to stand

before Eleazar the priest, who will obtain decisions for him by inquiring of the Urim before the LORD. At his command he and the entire community of the Israelites will go out, and at his command they will come in.” Moses did as the LORD commanded him. He took Joshua and had him stand before Eleazar the priest and the

whole assembly. Then he laid his hands on him and commissioned him, as the LORD instructed through Moses.




Deuteronomy 1:37–39 Because of you the LORD became angry with me also and said, “You shall not enter it, either. But your assistant, Joshua son of Nun, will enter it. Encourage him, because he will lead Israel to inherit it.”




Deuteronomy 3:27–29 “Go up to the top of Pisgah and look west and north and south and east. Look at the land with your own eyes, since you are not going to cross this Jordan. But commission Joshua, and encourage and strengthen him, for he will lead this people across and will cause them to inherit the land that you will see.” So we

stayed in the valley near Beth Peor.




These accounts contain all the important principles of mentoring and succession. If you study the relationship of Joshua and Moses, first you will notice:




The mentee must submit to the mentor and possess a spirit of student and servant. As Numbers 11:28 reads, Joshua “had been Moses’ aide since youth.”




Mentorship had begun. Notice that the mentee aided the mentor first. In other words, mentoring begins with serving the mentor. If you want to learn from someone, you have to submit to him or her. To learn from someone, you have to be willing to serve. Thus, mentorship really begins with willingness to serve.




The mentee must be teachable and must not be competitive with his mentor.




The second thing we find about Joshua is that the Scriptures do not call him a servant of Yah. They always call him an aide of Moses (see Exod. 24:13, Exod. 33:11, and Num. 11:28). That is important because you cannot

be mentored when you compete with your mentor. If you want someone to mentor you, you cannot attempt to be equal to your mentor. Joshua just wanted to be a servant of Moses. He had the correct attitude.




The mentee must be present but not too pushy and aggressive with the mentor. Joshua stayed with Moses all the time. Yet Scriptures cite little that he said, so we can infer that he did not talk much. He is quiet, but he is present. That fascinates me and intrigues me. Joshua was always with Moses because the prophet was his mentor. Joshua followed where Moses went, but he did

not assert himself.




The mentee will have access to the environment of the mentor but must never abuse it. Joshua had this kind of access. Scripture says the young man headed up

the mountain with his leader (see Exod. 24:13). Joshua accompanied Moses to the Tent of Meeting. This was a special tent that Moses had set up and where he met with Yah. They would have intimate conversations there, and

the only person who went into that tent with Moses was Joshua. A mentor can get you into places. The Bible says Moses left the Tent of Meeting, and Joshua stayed (see Exodus 33:11). Perhaps he was just basking in the

greatness of Yah. A mentor can get you into the presence of greatness, and you can actually stay there because the great one will start to talk to you.




Even then, the mentee must tread lightly, being careful not to abuse the relationship. The mentee must learn in silence when allowed into the privileged places of his mentor. No one knows what, if anything, Yah said to Joshua during those moments in the Tent of Meeting or if Joshua said anything. Maybe Joshua’s experience there was to prepare him for future leadership. Joshua experienced Yah in a way that no other person did because he was brought into Yah’s presence by his mentor. A mentor can open doors for you that no one else can open. Shared influence and connections are important elements of mentorship and succession.




The mentee must never compete with, nor be jealous of his mentor. When Joshua perceived a threat to his mentor, he expressed jealousy. It was jealousy, not of Moses but for Moses, which are very different things.

The mentee must not usurp the position of his mentor, but must protect and defend it. We see Joshua expressing an interesting “menteeship” spirit. Joshua wanted Moses to stop the new “prophets” because the loyal aide saw them as competing with his mentor. This is the kind of person you want to mentor. Joshua wanted to protect Moses from competitors, not compete with Moses.

It impressed Moses that this young man wanted to protect his position, not take it. Moses realized that Joshua had an interest, not only in serving him,

but also in defending him. Joshua was not looking out for himself. He was protecting Moses’ turf. The mentee must never abuse the privileges of his mentor.




Finally, Joshua did not usurp Moses’ authority. He was in the presence of the Yah of Moses but never tried to claim Moses’ relationship with Yah for himself. The Scripture shows that not only did Joshua know his place, but he

also wanted to protect the greatness or authority of his leader. He wanted to make sure others did not encroach on the prophet’s powers. As we see in the example of Moses and Joshua, mentorship presumes a “lesser” and a “greater” in a relationship. Mentoring implies that the lesser is learning from the greater through interaction, interpersonal contact, observation, and experiences.




Mentors provide access to their lives, decision

making processes, bank of wisdom, and environment. The mentee has access to the mentor’s relationships and resources. Resources can be people, material, and secrets the mentor might have. So mentoring is a very

personal—and in some cases a very private—relationship. This separates it from ordinary interpersonal relationships.




Set Up for Success




One of most important processes of mentoring is not just learning from the experience of the mentor, but also learning from the situations the mentor will allow you to experience. The mentor is like a gymnastics coach.




One afternoon I was watching a documentary about gymnastics that showed how these amazing professional athletes train to become world-class competitors. I watched the coach fasten the safety straps to a young girl.




After positioning her on the mat, the coach threw her into the air as if she were a bird while he stood right below her. Every time she touched down, he caught her by the waist and threw her again. He never left his post. I saw the initial fear in the girl’s eyes, but as the exercise progressed, I noticed the fear turning into a smile of confidence.




The documentary moved on to the next day and there they were again, but this time the straps were off and the coach was still catching her. Finally, the fifth day came, and the coach was on the sidelines with a smile of confidence on his face. He watched his student pace the floor like a pro and with style, grace, and passion, complete her routine without a single mistake and land

with a sense of maturity that amazed even the toughest judges on the bench.




He had successfully mentored a future leader in gymnastics who eventually went on to compete in the world games. Many times a mentor may seem to have set you up to experience a measure of failure, but he is really setting you up for success and is standing

by just in case you falter. Good mentors will provide opportunities for you to participate in a situation that could teach you a lesson or allow you to use your gifts to prevail. The mentor knows that a mistake or temporary failure is a necessary step toward learning and qualifying for future success as a leader.




The Job of the Mentee




In order to get the most out of the mentoring process, you must understand certain principles.




The Mentee:




Must submit to the mentor. It is impossible to learn from someone if you do not submit to that person. It is like a class that does not accept the teacher’s authority. Submission does not mean that you give up your independence, uniqueness, rights, or will. It does not mean that the mentor is smarter than you or more talented. It means the mentor knows something that you want to learn. Be submissive to advice and instruction. I sometimes encounter people who ask me to mentor them but who then refuse my advice or instruction.




Right away that cancels our agreement. I cannot help someone who does not submit. Submission in this instance means that you understand and value the

contributions that the mentor can make to your life. You are willing to surrender your time and your ability to learn and receive from that mentor. Submission is the first act for the mentee.




Must accept that the mentor is acting in the best interest of the mentee. You have to believe that whatever the mentor recommends, instructs, or advises is in your best interest. Your mentor’s instructions may not seem to make sense at the time, and they might take you out of your comfort zone. The mentor’s counsel might seem strange to you or put you in unfamiliar surroundings. You must trust the judgment and carry out the instructions (within reason) of your mentor. Good mentors will never set you up for destruction. They will set you up for development, if you let them.




Mentors see your future far beyond what you see, so you need to trust their vision. Many times they will tell you do not do this or that, or to do something. They are preparing you for something they see for you ten years down the road. Must be willing to accept the mentor’s counsel. Do not ignore their instructions. We often claim that we submit to our mentors, and we still do not accept what they say. If you want to benefit from the mentor, you must

take the advice offered. To get the benefit, you have to accept the counsel offered.




The mentee must trust the mentor’s judgment. You cannot lead people who do not trust you, and you cannot learn from someone you do not trust. Remember, a good mentor does not want anything from you. The mentor did not pursue you. If the mentor gives you advice, he means it for your own good.




Must never abuse the privileges offered by a mentor. A mentor will give you access to such things as her private contacts, environment, or home. Mentors will give you access to the things they are reading, maybe their

friendships and other relationships, or even their venues, markets, and audiences. The mentee must be very cautious not to abuse any of those privileges. If the mentor gives you her private number, you cannot give it to people to prove you know someone powerful or famous. This is abuse. To have that number is a privilege.




Alternatively, if the mentor introduces you to one of

her contacts, you cannot go behind her back to try to work out a deal for yourself with that contact. That is an abuse of the relationship and an embarrassment to the mentor. It might have taken the mentor forty years to

make that connection, and she can give it to you willingly in forty seconds, but do not abuse it.




I expose my mentees to my television programs, let them meet my publishers, or give them the microphone to speak to ten thousand people for a few minutes. I do that because I want to build their confidence and help them,

but if the mentee secretly asks the host to invite them alone to speak next time, the mentee is abusing the privilege. People have told others I am their friend when they only met me once at a ministry somewhere and shook my hand. Do not abuse such opportunities offered by your mentor. You can say, “Yes, I have met that person. I shook his hand some time ago,” but do not say

that person is your friend when it is not true. I may give you access to the head of a country because you happen to be with me. That does not mean that you are his friend. I am his friend, and you should not disrespect him or me

by calling him next week for a casual chat. He does not know you, and that would be an abuse of the privilege the mentor offered. If you have a mentor, you will get access to that person’s life. Do not abuse it. Respect, honor,

protect, and safeguard the privileges given you by the mentor.




Must initiate or pursue learning from the mentor. Once you have a mentor, the pursuit continues. You have to pursue what you want to learn from the mentor. If you claim you want me to be your mentor, for instance,

then you have to prove it by your hunger, passion, and willingness to submit to my authority. The learner must not sit around and wait for the mentor to teach her or to develop her. Anyone worth having as a mentor will be fully engaged in work and other obligations. The one who wants to learn must pursue the mentor by cultivating the spirit of initiative.




You may feel as if the mentor is ignoring you at times, but remember mentors are busy. Just follow the mentor around and watch. Tell the mentor, “I want to see how you handle pressure, people, and stress.” The mentor will

not come to you to teach you five points on how to handle stress. You have to watch to see how they deal with pressures. Mentoring is more by observation than by instructions, so pursue the mentor. That is what Elisha did. In the end, he went to Elijah. That was what the disciples of Yahusha did. They forsook their fishing businesses and followed Yahusha wherever He went. They ate with Him and went to little villages with Him. The very word disciple means perpetual student, from the Latin and Greek for “learner” or “one who learns.” This implies that it is a continuous thing. Although it has come to be

associated with the twelve associates closest to Yahusha during His ministry on earth, it is not a religious word. It is someone who keeps learning. The instructor will teach only those who are hungry for education. The one who

wants to learn should pursue the teacher.




Should harness the power of questions. As an emerging leader, you must ask questions of the mentor, accessing one of the greatest mechanisms of mentorship. The protégé pursues the mind, the methods, the mechanisms,

and the mission of the mentor by initiating questions. Ask questions of the mentor. Nothing is more powerful as a tool for learning than asking questions. Mentors always know more than they tell you. Mentors can always

do more than they show you. They can always take you places you have never been, but you have to initiate the journey via questions. A mentor is like a reservoir, full of knowledge and information, experience and wisdom

—all wonderful, powerful substances—and you need to pull it out of them. A question is like putting a hole in a dam. The more questions you ask, the more holes you poke. If you ask enough questions, a torrent of wisdom will gush forth.




Good students do not talk much. They ask questions. When a mentee is in the presence of a mentor, he or she must speak little and let the mentor talk. This is usually by the mechanism of questioning. When I studied the process Yahusha used to teach the disciples, I was shocked to discover that most of His lessons resulted from a question someone asked. The gospels are full of examples like these:




Luke 17:20 Once, having been asked by the Pharisees when the kingdom of Yah would come, Yahusha replied, “The kingdom of Yah does not come with your careful observation…”




Mark 13:4 “Tell us, when will these things happen? And what will be the sign that they are all about to be fulfilled?”




Yahusha shared His wisdom with those who asked for it. To draw out information from the mentor, you have to ask for it. I always tell my students wherever I am around the world that when you are in the presence of a wise

or great person, ask questions and be silent. Whenever I meet anyone with much more experience and wisdom and with great accomplishments and success, I start asking questions. Questions automatically give you the ability to be the student. Mentees must ask questions. He who speaks, learns only what he knows; he who listens, learns what the other knows. Through listening, you become wiser. In this way, mentees initiate their own learning.




Sometimes you may be so determined to impress the mentor that you talk too much. If you are always talking, the mentor can become very irritated. If you want answers, do not tell the mentor what great things you do and how powerful you are, how anointed you are, what a good manager you are. How can you learn if you are talking?




Invests personal resources in pursuit of the mentor. Some mentees expect the mentor to pay for their development. Frequently people ask,“Will you mentor me?” and I reply,

“Okay, fine, let us agree that I will mentor you. As part of my mentoring program, I offer the elite privilege of allowing you to travel with me to experience my environment.” I find it very strange when someone responds, “Great! Can you send me a ticket?” Who is supposed to be pursuing whom? If you want to learn from me, you must be willing to invest your time, money, and resources in pursuit of that knowledge.




We need to understand the power of pursuit. If you want to learn from me, then invest your time, your money, and your resources in pursuit of me. You will have to invest in your own life. I have books, CDs, DVDs, and seminars.

If you are my mentee, I expect you to buy all of those books because you need to know my mind, my heart. Forty years of my experiences are in those books. When you buy the mentor’s book, you are not just buying the book. You are buying the person.




On occasion, a mentee has asked me a question, and I have refused to answer it because I have answered that question in a book I wrote. I tell them to read the book. Invest that twenty dollars to find the answer for yourself. As your mentor, I do not want your money, but I want you to invest in your own development. Always remember this: the job of a teacher is not to give answers but to stimulate the students to go find the answers themselves. Nothing is yours until you understand it.




Must never compete with the mentor. The mentee must be very aware that he is not in the relationship to compete, but to learn. First, this deals with motive. A mentee is one who wants to learn, who wants to become like the mentor in many different aspects, who would like to benefit from the mentor’s knowledge, experience, and wisdom. You cannot easily learn from someone when you are attempting to compete with him. You will find that mentors will resist the spirit of competition from a mentee because it reveals a spirit of pride or arrogance. It also reveals a spirit of distrust.




Must never take the mentor’s advice or criticism personally. If the mentor says things in a moment of anger or corrects you, it is to prevent harm from coming to you or to teach you a lesson. When Elijah told Elisha,

“Go back… What have I done to you?” (1 Kings 19:20), it must have sounded harsh, but it was necessary. When Yahusha told Peter that he was full of the devil, the words must have stung (see Matt. 16:23). Whatever the

circumstances, when the mentor speaks in the heat of the moment, the person on the receiving end must be cautious not to take the words personally.




The mentor might say, “Son, why are you dressed like that at this location? Go home and change into your suit.” Do not take that personally. He is trying to protect you because he knows that people at this event will be dressed in a certain way, and they will judge you or even refuse to admit you if you are not attired in a similar fashion. The invitation said “black tie,” and you are in tennis whites—nice clothes, but not the right ones.




A mentor might say, “Do not come in here right now. Please wait outside.” Do not take it personally. Perhaps it is a matter of protocol. Only people of a certain rank or members of a fraternal group are allowed in today.

Maybe he is discussing a confidential personnel matter.

He might say, “You can’t come to this reception with me. The president or prime minister will be there, and security is tight. You don’t have clearance. Just wait in the lobby.” At times, the mentor may not be able to or may not be inclined to give an explanation. Do not take that personally. He knows things you do not know.




A mentor will give you instructions that might make you feel uncomfortable. He may say things that hurt your feelings. Just trust that this too is for your benefit. “I will figure it out later. It hurts right now, but it is for my own good.” After Yahusha told Peter that he was full of the devil, the disciple still showed up at the next meeting. He did not take it personally. In a moment of anger, a mentor will say things that sting. Yahusha Hamachiach was angry because Peter had said, “You will not die” (see Matt. 16:21–22). Peter was attacking the vision. Yahusha was correcting Peter, and He did not say it nicely.




Anger is part of the mentoring process because the mentor sees you in your future and attacks the danger that threatens you. It is not personal. It is love. The leader wants to teach you a lesson. When a mentor speaks in the heat of the moment, you have to handle it. Be mature, suck in your stomach,come back and say,“Thank you.” Later on you will say,“Wow! Now I see why she did that.” Do not despise the anger of your mentor. It too is for your

good.




Must never be jealous of the mentor’s success. Often a young, emerging leader sees the life of the mentor and assumes or presumes that he could achieve instantly what the mentor has spent years of effort—a lifetime

of work—building up. In some cases, the mentor has experienced mistakes, failures, loss, disgrace, depression, or bankruptcy and come back out again to

overcome them before achieving what he or she has. The most important question a mentee should ask a mentor is not, “How can I have what you have?” That is the wrong question. Rather ask, “What did it cost you to

achieve that? What is the price you paid to achieve that?” The student needs to learn the process and the experiences necessary to achieve the goal.




The mentee must be very cautious not to cultivate jealousy regarding the mentor’s observed achievement. If you sought out a mentor, it is because that person is successful. You cannot learn from someone if you are jealous of her. Often emerging leaders see the life that the mentor has and desire it.




Mentees have a temptation to want instantly what the mentor gained over time. The CEO has a jet, a luxury car, a beach house, and more money than you ever dreamed of having, but you do not know what it cost him—fifty years of tough living. Do you covet the aircraft? Why not ask him what it cost to get that private jet? The answer is liable to be: “Oh, twenty years of criticism, five years of depression, two years of ostracism, and ten years of bankruptcy.




Then I finally got back on my feet and spent another ten years building my business to the point that I could afford all this. Now I travel three hundred days out of the year and hardly ever see my gorgeous wife and my darling

children. I haven’t had a home-cooked meal or slept in my own bed in weeks.” Never mind. It is not worth the price. Never be jealous of anyone, especially your mentor.




Must follow instructions even if it demands personal sacrifice. Many times a mentor will give the mentee an assignment, an instruction, or a project that may require a sacrifice of time, resources, energy, or relationships. The mentee must trust the mentor to the point of obedience.

That is a frightening word, but you have to obey the mentor because he knows more than you do. He has been where you plan to go and has done what you intend to do. If the mentor gives you instructions, just obey them.




This is hard for some of you to do because your pride is so tall that Yah cannot even get above it. Mentees also have to believe in the mentor’s belief in them. It is scary to do something for the first time. The mentor may give

you an opportunity that you never experienced before, but the fact that he gave it to you is evidence that he believes in you, even when you do not. That is the mentor’s way of developing your belief in yourself.




If you want to be mentored, you have to sacrifice. Now, be careful because some people who say they want to mentor you actually want you to buy them things—rings and clothing, for instance. They are not mentors. They are fleece artists. Good mentors make you spend money on yourself, not on them. Be careful about the person who professes to mentor you but wants you to make them rich. That is not a mentor. If so-called mentors take

from you, they are not mentors. If they demand that you enhance their lifestyle or that you do anything against Yah’s Word, the Bible, it is not mentoring. It is abuse.




Must be honest in the relationship with the mentor. No pretense, misrepresentation, or lack of integrity should enter the mentoring relationship. The mentor cannot afford to have the precious time he devotes to the relationship misused or devalued. The two parties must demonstrate mutual respect, integrity, and honesty. Do not try to be something before the mentor that you are not. The mentor will dismantle you. Do not lie to a

mentor. The mentor will eject you. Be open, transparent.

Do not try to misrepresent yourself to impress the mentor. You must have integrity.




Tell the mentor your vulnerabilities, your weaknesses, and your struggles. Be honest about what you do not know. This person can help you. If you are perfect, why do you need a mentor? The mentor can handle your secrets. The mentor knows how to manage your frailty. Mentors can help fix the cracks in your character. Mentors do not use your private information for personal

gain. They are there to improve you, so be honest with them. The mentor cannot afford to have the precious time he or she spends on you abused. Perhaps I have been preparing you for a certain position, and I find out later that you are not available or disqualified because of something else going on in your life or in your past. Both of us have wasted time. If I spent five months mentoring you, and I find out that what you are doing in secret has cancelled everything I did, you have abused my time. Mentoring demands honesty.




The Continuing-Education Program




Submitting to a mentor is a smart decision. It is not demeaning. It does not make you less. It makes you more. Mentorship is critical. The mentor is not

in it for gain. The mentor is in it to help you gain. Cherish the privilege and never abuse it. If you do not choose to benefit from the privileges extended by the mentor, the mentor never loses. The mentor knows what he knows, is

who he or she is. If you choose not to benefit, you will never become all you could be because you did not complete the mentoring process.




The mentee is more indebted to the mentor than the mentor is to the mentee. Yet each has a role to play and responsibilities in the relationship. Mentors respect mentees. They do not ignore your value. They know that you are important. In fact, a mentor will respect you just because you decided to enter the mentoring relationship. You never outgrow mentors. You must always be under somebody. The day you think that you do not need a mentor, you are a threat to humanity. I submit to my mentors quickly. Whenever I am in the presence of anyone who has great wisdom, I am a professional questioner. When I first met Nelson Mandela, I met history. I do not have those moments often in my life. I did

not want to spend my limited time with him telling him who I was, where I am from, and what I was doing. As far as I was concerned, I had just met a father and I was a child.




I started asking questions because I had to learn a lot in a short time. I do not have to take time to talk about me because I already know about me. My questions gave me the power to draw on his wisdom and learn from him. I was his student, however briefly, and I submitted to his instruction. Some people who sign up for my mentoring program are seventy-five years old. They are still learning, and they realize that I have something they need. Age is not an issue in mentoring. Peter was older than Yahusha. The mentor already has achieved a level of success and effectiveness regardless of age. Mentors reap rewards for fulfilling their purpose, not for their years. The mentee is the one who needs the development, the cultivation.




Do not abuse, misuse, ignore, or devalue the privileges extended by the mentor and squander opportunities to learn. Respect, cherish, and value the relationship. You will be the beneficiary.




Points to remember:




The mentor chooses, but the mentee pursues.




The mentee must submit to the mentor’s guidance, ask questions, and cherish the relationship